One Ball? Booooring

Obviously, my dad doesn't like the NBA Slam Dunk Contest. He doesn't like people jumping over cars (Blake Griffin), or people dunking and grabbing teddy bears off of the rim with their teeth (Serge Ibaka). Basically, he doesn't like it because it's different from what it used to be.

I'm actually fairly anti-change myself, but the Dunk Contest is different. Anything without any props and with only one basketball has already been done. Who wants to see a repeat? I know I'd watch a new episode of a TV show over a rerun any day of the week. Saturday, Javale McGee of the Wizards set an NBA record of five basketballs dunked on his first two attempts! That's what I'm talking about.

Maybe the "best dunkers" are beginning to be overshadowed by the "most creative dunkers". But what's wrong with that? No NBA championships are being won or lost on All Star Saturday Night. Winning this contest isn't going to make or break these players' careers. The contest is there for entertainment, and entertain it did.

-Robby

The Real Reason We Ski

Robby, you’re totally right. No one likes to ski.

But . . . everyone loves apres-ski. Trouble is, you can’t get to the apres without the ski. It’s like in baseball: What team wouldn’t like to go directly to its closer? But you can’t do it. If your starter gives you six, and you’re bringing in your closer in the ninth, you need another pitcher to bridge that gap. Skiing is that bridge. It’s the only way to get to apres skiing.

Yeah, of course I’d love to stay in my cozy bed on a cold Vermont morning. Of course I’d celebrate if we got a call from Stratton Mountain saying, sorry, we’re closed for the day. I’d love to dive directly into my favorite ski-lodge lunch of chili-in-a-bread-bowl with a side of fries. I’d be only too happy to wrap myself in a plush white towel come late afternoon and jump in the sauna. I’d be thrilled to join the raucous crowd at the bar watching Jets v. Pats on the 746-inch flat-screen TV. I could really get into knocking back a bunch of Long Trails and bragging about those mogul runs I shredded. (I’m doing just that in the photo.)

But do you really think anyone’s gonna let me weasel in on these pleasures without making me ski first? That’s a negative, Ghost Rider.

Bottom line? Skiing isn’t always bathed in the sun-drenched glory you see in Warren Miller films — it’s true. But apres-skiing? Ah, now that’s something special. And until someone finds another way to get toapres, I’ll just have to keep on skiing.

-Hank

America's National Wasteoftime

Unfortunately, I pretty much share the same feelings as my dad on the topic of "Top 5 Players," so I'm not going to waste time arguing about it.

Also unfortunate is the fact that my Tuesday shoulder surgery is causing me to type this post with one hand. (Yeah, don't say I don't have heart.)

There is one issue that my dad and I have recently talked about that we disagree on. It doesn't pertain to a sport that we follow, although it is technically a sport: skiing.

I tend to think of myself as a realist, much more so than my dad at least. For instance, while it's easy to be excited about young Knicks such as Danilo Gallinari and Landry Fields, he thinks the Knicks will win the NBA Championship, whereas I understand that they'll be ousted in the first round by a true contender such as the Bulls or Heat.

Same goes for skiing. I've been saying for years what everyone in my family has been thinking: None of us actually likes skiing. It's a simple fact. Our family has been skiing for my whole life and way beyond that, so it has pretty much become an accepted winter tradition. But why?

I would honesty like to know if my dad has ever once woken up in his cozy bed in Vermont and thought to himself, "Man, I can't wait to go skiing today!"

I would love to see him try to act upset if he was awoken by a call from Stratton Mountain announcing they are closed for the day due to construction.

These scenarios couldn't possibly happen, because let's face it, no one likes to ski. It's cold, uncomfortable, and time-wasting. I mean, seriously, between driving to the mountain, putting on ski clothes and equipment, plus all the time spent on the chair lifts, we are actually skiing about 10% of the time. And that 10% isn't even fun. There's no competition, no winners, no losers, nothing to fight for.

My brothers finally admitted this year that I've been right all along. That they've never liked skiing, they've merely tried to convince themselves that they had liked it. Now I'm waiting for my dad to jump on board. There's plenty of room on the bandwagon.

-Robby